1Cor 13:4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
Here is how the dictionary defines unkindness:
1. Lacking kindness; inconsiderate or unsympathetic.
2. Harsh; severe; cruel:
Love is patient and kind… Kindness in love is like the sweetness to honey. It is an essential part of what makes it so delicious. But what happens when we say we love someone but the characteristic of kindness looks more like unkindness? Can we really then declare that we love them?
Unkindness, just like impatience, is a sin. It is an offense to God and to the person we have chosen to spend the rest of our lives with. Lack of kindness often occurs when we have lost our patience and decide to take matters into our own hands and react to a certain situation. Patience, or long suffering, results in kindness. Impatience, or being short tempered, results in unkindness. Kindness is a fruit of the spirit that God.
We have all been around someone who is unkind. And I am certain each one of us has a story or two of a time when we were unkind. I remember a time in my marriage only a few short years ago where I said and did some pretty unkind things towards my wife. Not only did I reap the shame and guilt from my ungodly behaviors, but the level of trust was lessened and her and I had to spend a bit more time breaking through barriers that would have not been placed there had my actions and heart displayed kindness rather than being harsh and cruel.
Unkindness is more than an action and behavior. Often times it becomes a way of life and the detriment is far reaching. Not only is the spouse affected, but the kids and other family members are seriously affected as well.
When we look at the definition of unkindness it can be quite sobering. Words such as harsh, cruel, and unsympathetic come to mind. On your wedding day did the thought run through your mind, “Geez, I think I want to live a harsh, cruel, and unsympathetic life with this person for the rest of my life?” I think not!
So how do we break the cycle of unkindness in our marriage and learn how to live in the fruit of kindness? The first step I have found is to remember that kindness is a gift of the Holy Spirit.
There is no man or woman on this planet capable of mustering up true Biblical kindness so we must rely on the power of the Holy Spirit.
Tomorrow I hope to share more. Until then, pray that if you struggle at all with being unkind, that the Spirit of God will provide all you need today to display His loving-kindness to everyone you encounter.
Blessings,
Keith